


You don't have to be a hero

by AlAngel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, also fluff and cuteness, emotional h/c, feels (and lots of them you were warned), oh and did I mention feels?, self-doubt (mostly on Crowleys side)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-29
Updated: 2017-08-29
Packaged: 2018-12-21 08:22:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11940156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlAngel/pseuds/AlAngel
Summary: When you find your bed empty in the middle of the night and go in search of your husband, you make a both heart-breaking and heart-warming discovery and are reminded more than ever that Crowley deserves to be loved.





	You don't have to be a hero

Title: You don’t have to be a hero  
Character: Crowley x Reader, your baby boy (OC)  
Genre: Fluff  
Word Count: ~1.4k  
Warnings: emotional h/c, feels (and lots of them you were warned), self-doubt (mostly on Crowleys side), oh and did I mention feels?, also fluff and cuteness,  
Summary: When you find your bed empty in the middle of the night and go in search of your husband, you make a both heart-breaking and heart-warming discovery and are reminded more than ever that Crowley deserves to be loved.  
A/n: For @meganlpie‘s Musical AU Challenge. My song was “You don’t have to be a hero” from the Disney movie Balto III. I’ve never watched the movie but I love the song so much and it’s perfect for Crowley. Lyrics is in italics. Hope you like this and it’s anything like what you had in mind for the challenge.  
......

 

You woke up to a dark room. Your first instinct told you to be very still and quiet and to listen for any sound. But even as you listen intently there was no sound to be heard. Nothing but peaceful darkness.

For a second you let yourself relax into the calmness. A good night sleep was rare and you were quite happy to use it to get some more sleep. About to fall asleep again you noticed the absence of any kind of sound. Tired but still on high alert you let your hand wander to the other side of the bed.

The absence of another warm body and the turned over, cold sheets put you in an even more alert state. Although the love of your life was a demon and did not need any sleep, he’d still lay beside you. Crowley claimed it relaxed him to know you were safe and asleep beside him and he was more productive on hells paper work with you close. You always smiled when he said that. Because you were sure it couldn’t be comfortable to work in the darkness of a bedroom when a perfectly fine desk was waiting in his office, but you appreciated it nonetheless. As his Queen you had seen things, done things, that were nightmare material but with him close you felt safe, protected and loved. The king of hell was the best thing that could have ever happened to you.

But with him missing you couldn’t simply turn over and go back to sleep. Worried you flipped your own covers over and slipped into some fluffy shoes to not walk barefoot on the cold bedroom floor. A small shiver ran down your back, your body missed the comfortable covers but you ignored the tired pull back into their warmth. You needed to check on your men.

Silently you left the bedroom and walked across the dark hallway. There was no light to be seen anywhere in the house, no sound to be heard. An uneasy feeling settled into your guts as you slowly opened the white door opposite your similar looking bedroom door. It had already been open a gash, so it didn’t made a sounds you pushed it further open.

As you looked inside your eyes first fell on the crib. You had built it yourself, well using the IKEA instructions but you were still very proud. Crowley had been insisting to get something fancy, pre-built maybe even custom made but you had been stubborn yourself. You wanted to do this for your baby, you wanted his first bed to be something you made for him. And as your eyes fell on the white painted thing you smiled because you had won. It took a whole afternoon and lots of swearing but this crib was your way of preparing for the new life that had already been living inside you at the time.

Looking around from where the crib stood, white and innocent, your eyes flew over a crib mobile and a lamp shaped like the moon until they settled on someone sitting on a chair. His head in his hands you studied the slouched form of your husband. He hadn’t noticed you yet, his focus entirely on the crib and your baby boy. His elbows were resting on his knees while his hands cupped his cheeks and supported the weight of his head. It wasn’t a proud and king like position, instead it seemed small and worried. Your heart ached, not knowing what was wrong.

For a second you let yourself wonder what could have him so unusual brooding. Wasn’t the baby what he wanted after all? You remembered how your heart had been fluttering when you first told him about the pregnancy. His eyes had light up with excitement back then and he kissed you with a total new kind of passion. But that had been before your little prince was born, before someone else needed a lot of your attention leaving you both exhausted. Crowley was the king of hell, maybe domestic wasn’t his style after all.

You took a step towards him, ready to talk to him when you heard his deep voice whisper to the sleeping baby. His voice was so much quieter and a little strained. This wasn’t the king of hell, this was a man scared of being a father.

“What if I fail you too?” Crowley sounded so defeated “I am terrible at being a father, you know. Gavin, he… Well I’d like to spare you the ugly details but I’ve been the worst father imaginable for your half-brother. Some days I think my mother was better at parenting than I was and she sold me for some pigs. I tried. But you see my family is not exactly known for their skills at keeping a family together.”

You heard Crowley swallow and your heart ached for him. You had talked about his past, both as a human and as a demon. But never had you seen him so broken and vulnerable. Whenever he talked about his past he always put on a strong face and told it to you matter-of-factly, keeping as much of the hurt out of his voice. Seeing him like this brought tears into your eyes.

“I want to be better for you. I promise to do my best. Your mother changed me. I know she can’t see it, she tries so hard to believe there has always been some goodness in me. But everything worth calling good I ever did I did for her. I didn’t care about doing what was right or good before her, I didn’t care at all. But with her I want to prove that I can be a man worthy of her love.

“I just… You have to be patient with me. Can you do that, son? You and your mom are the most important people in my life. And I love both of you so, so much. I am the king of hell. I’m not the father anyone deserves but I will try. I promise. I want to do right by you.”

There was more than a strain in his voice now. Never before had the mighty king of hell sounded so broken. Not even to you and you knew he trusted you like no one else. It saddened and made your heart beat faster at the same time seeing what trust and love he showed his barely two month old son.

Crowley had been right you believed that there always has been some kind of goodness in him. No one changed completely, not even for love. He had always been more than just an ordinary, emotionless, cunning demon. He just hadn’t seen it before.

You could feel small tears leaving your eyes as you quietly made your way over to him. You didn’t announce your presence verbally, you put your hand on his back and smiled as he lifted his head to meet your eyes. It was too dark to be sure but you felt like there was a small tint of red on his cheeks and embarrassment written his eyes. Clearly he hadn’t meant for you to hear any of this.

“I love you” Was the first thing you said, stepping around him to sit on his knees. That way you could look him right in his big brown eyes for your next words. Because hearing him admit all those things to your sleeping baby reminded you more than ever how much Crowley deserved to be loved even though deep down he himself doubted he deserved it. “He doesn’t need to know you’re perfect. He needs to know you care. You might be the king of hell, Crowley, but I’ve never met a single man who cares more than you do. Believe in who you are and then time can do the rest. Your heart is his example, brave, and strong and true. You don’t have to be a hero. You just have to be you.”

“What if I’m not enough?”

“That’s why we are a team” You smiled encouragingly “You, me and our son. We are a family. And families are supposed to work together. You don’t have to do this on your own. All you need to do is have faith in yourself, my love. And Have faith in him too. If he’s anything like us he’s way too stubborn to not adore you.”

“You mean anything like you, you are the stubborn one, darling”

“Oh I learned from the king of stubbornness” You giggled quietly to not wake your son and pressed a soft kiss right on Crowley’s nose “Come back to bed and don’t worry. Trust me and Trust in your son. You are an amazing husband and father.”


End file.
